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Our Deeper Motivations – Are They Helping us or Hindering us?

Our Deeper Motivations – Are They Helping us or Hindering us?

Our motivations are the ideals or values that you are living by, which determine your actions in every situation. There are two types of ideals that you can follow: those motivated by your personality or ego, or those motivated by your Higher Self or Divine Self. If you are following the motivations of your ego it is likely that in some, or perhaps many areas of your life, it is leading you into some form of suffering. In reality any area where you are suffering negative emotions is a sign that you are following and acting upon the ideals of the ego.A differentiator between these two types of ideals is that those of the ego lead us into some form of action or behaviour whereas those of the Higher Self lead us to ideals that are expressed in essence, not form. Here are some examples of Higher ideals:

  • Following your intuition
  • Being in the present moment
  • Coming from your heart in all that you say and do
  • Being willing to “shine your light”
  • Valuing honesty, truth and authenticity
  • Valuing feedback in the knowledge that there is no need to defend yourself
  • Seeing challenges as an opportunity to learn and grow
  • Wanting to serve others and the planet
  • Being willing to follow the Higher plan for your life
  • Valuing your time and your energy
  • Desiring expansions of consciousness
  • Desiring expansion and growth in your life
  • Seeking out the new, the unknown and the unfamiliar
  • Wanting new perspectives and insights
  • Having the ability to lift others
  • Wanting to make a difference
  • Transmitting light or positive energies to others
  • Being loving, and where you are unable to love, being forgiving
  • Feeling compassion for others

Personality or ego ideals always include the “have to’s” and the “shoulds” and they often lead you into striving and busyness. Any area where you are striving that is not bringing you joy is a sure sign that you are following some personality ideals. They lead also to feelings of heaviness or resistance and they always seek to maintain a certain self image that we have of ourselves that we wish to maintain.

There are certain personality ideals that come with wanting to be seen as a spiritual person. These include being good/nice all the time, criticising yourself if you are not perfect or if you have experienced negative emotions, being hard on yourself if your meditation has not gone well or if you have gone against your inner wisdom, always being perfect, keeping everyone happy, pushing yourself to grow, and growing  faster than is comfortable for you…need I go on!

Whenever you act based on what you expect of yourself or what others expect from you in a certain role, it is likely that you are following personality ideals. This does not mean that your actions are wrong, but the motivation behind the actions is wrong.  Very often when we look closely at our ideals and really go to what is deep underneath them, we do find the ideals of our Higher Self. It is just that we are expressing the ideals in the wrong way. For example, the need to be loved or liked, which is such a common one, is really hiding the Higher ideal of giving and receiving love. If we are able to let go of the need, then we can express this Higher ideal easily. The important thing is to be able to let go of the attachment to having love, or whatever else it is that we are attached to having. Without the attachment/ desire we can easily express the Higher ideal. I always think of detachment as being happy if I have something and I am happy if I don’t. With that level of detachment, things can flow to us easily and effortlessly.

Other examples of these personality ideals that come up in different areas of life are:

  • The desire to be popular or famous
  • Wanting to be approved of
  • Keeping quiet to keep the peace
  • Always being strong
  • Having to be seen to be perfect
  • Wanting to be in control
  • Desire to avoid emotional pain or discomfort  or growth
  • Needing money/success/material possessions to feel good about yourself
  • Being devoted to money, success or to certain people
  • Sacrificing yourself to help others
  • Working hard/being busy to feel important
  • Wanting to save others
  • Wanting to stay safe, protected and unseen and not grow
  • Resisting change and the new
  • Hiding your light and being “hidden”

If you sense that you are acting out of any of these ideals, ask for the awareness of when you are acting out of these ideals and be willing to gently let them go. Place them in the hands of your Higher Mind, or God and ask that they be released. Sometimes we feel negative emotions as we let go of those ideals that we have held to all of our lives. Be willing to go through this and let them go anyway, so that you can embody the Higher ideals that allow you to act with greater ease in every area of  your life.

Who is Sarah Alexander

Sarah is passionate about supporting business professionals and entrepreneurs in undergoing amazing personal transformation whilst achieving results within their career with low stress.

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